My guest today is Ben Bruce, English musician and vocalist for the rock band Asking Alexandria. Bruce founded the band while he was living in Dubai but the back split and he moved back to the United Kingdom, where he then started the band again under the same name.
He comes on today to share some of the lessons he learned from his upbringing, as well as this amazing relationship that he has with his mom and how he goes about navigating it. We talk about how he keeps that relationship just incredibly on point mom and how she’s highly involved in his life and no matter how much fame and fortune and him being a celebrity in his life has become his mom will always look at him and say, you’re always Ben to me.
Ben and I talk about how he elevates his marriage and relationships with his children.
What You’ll Learn
6:25 Interview Begins
8:57 Why 4 kids under 5?
Ben talks about how he always knew he wanted to be a dad since he was very young. The close relationships in his family is what allows him to have young kids and he is very proud of each one of his children.
11:41 Lessons from tough times
Ben Bruce recalls the hardships of having to sleep on the floor and situations of that sort as he was a kid. He recalls those tough times and considers them being a blessing in disguise since those are moments that brough the family together and to this day, continues to do so.
13:53 Struggles & Connection
15:53 How to tell you’re homesick
Ben tells the story of how he knows that he is somesick while being away on tour.
25:01 Being on Tour vs. Staying home
26:11 Music & Fatherhood
Ben shares how his music writing process works. He will be writing a song and his kids will pop into his studio at home as they are playing or want to tell him something and he sings a bit of it to them, and depending on the response, whether they sing or not, is the type of positive or negative feedback he gets from them. It doesn’t get more honest than that.
31:19 Differences between raising daughters and sons
Ben Bruce talks about what he considers the real differences between raising boys and girls. It’s not really about what they wear and superficial things like that, but more about the natural traits that come with being a boy or a girl and he notices those traits are very different. He shares a clear example, although he doesn’t want to say that girls are smarter than boys.
34:54 What is the most meaningful in raising boys and girls
Ben shares an important lesson he believes is behind the true meaning of raising boys and girls and that is ultimately letting them be happy.
39:09 Nurture and Nourish Passions
Ben Bruce touches on the subject of helping your kids to nurture and nourish the passions that they like, and not your own. Let them find their path. This is something that you often see a lot, where parents want their kids to practice a certain sport and force their kids to so but the child doesn’t really like it.
39:38 Outside influence
44:09 You don’t talk about
45:50 Honoring Your Wife
Ben talks about how he has learned from a broken marriage and one of those lessons was to make sure his wife is seen and she knows that she is a priority in his life, even before their kids, because all too often, our partners can feel like they are taking a backseat once kids come or a backseat to our careers.
Ben Bruce’s Links
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