Mental strength is something most of us struggle with. Dealing with grief, fear, and disappointment is a constant challenge for adults. Children have even more difficulty navigating uncomfortable feelings. How can we raise mentally strong kids?
Today’s guest is Amy Morin, the bestselling author of the book called 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do. She is a psychotherapist, writer, and TEDx speaker. She is here to tell us how to become mentally strong parents so we can raise self-assured kids who are primed for happiness and success.
This show is full of incredible insights that will change the lives of adults and children. Save it, because you’ll want to listen to it more than once.
[bctt tweet=”‘Our tendency is to go around uncomfortable feelings instead of through them.’ – @AmyMorinLCSW #parenting #dads #fathers #kids #children” username=”gooddadprojct”]
Amy Morin recorded this episode from her boat which she has been living on for 2 years. From there she works on her computer writing articles and doing interviews. Amy Morin wrote a list called 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do. This article went viral with more than 50 million readers. She wrote a book based on that list and wrote a second book especially for parents.
As a therapist, Amy’s goal was always to teach other people how to be mentally strong, but shortly after she began her work, her mother passed away suddenly from a brain aneurysm at the age of fifty-one. This was Amy’s first big loss and she didn’t know how to cope. She saw people who went through loss in her office and they were still not over it even decades later. She knew she had to figure out how to get through it and emerge stronger than she was before. She accomplished this by turning her grief into a learning experience.
Just when she was getting a handle on her life again, her husband passed away on the anniversary of her mom’s death. He was twenty-six. To say it was painful is an understatement. She lost her partner and all the goals and dreams they had together. They had been foster parents and she wondered if she could continue as a single woman. It took a long time before she felt better and reestablished a new since of normal.
Four years later she found love again. She got married, sold her house, and got a new job. Her new husband joined her a as a foster parent. Things seemed to finally be looking up, but shortly after that, her father-in-law was diagnosed with terminal cancer.
Amy was beginning to feel like life was unfair.
She knew it wasn’t helpful to think like this. It wasn’t what mentally strong people do, so she wrote a list if all the things she could think of that mentally strong people don’t do. It turned out to be thirteen key things and she published the list online. The response was incredible. No one knew the tragic story behind why she created it.
Everyone assumed I mastered the list, but I struggled with it.
[bctt tweet=”‘We develop core beliefs about life when we’re little kids, and as we grow older some of those beliefs don’t serve us very well, but it’s so hard to unlearn the things that you know.’ – @AmyMorinLCSW #parenting #personalgrowth #personaldevelopment” username=”gooddadprojct”]
What you’ll learn
- An in-depth look at the 13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t D0
- They Don’t Condone a Victim Mentality
- They Don’t Parent Out Of Guilt
- They Don’t Make Their Child The Center Of The Universe
- They Don’t Allow Fear To Dictate Their Choices
- They Don’t Give Their Child Power Over Them
- They Don’t Expect Perfection
- They Don’t Let Their Child Avoid Responsibility
- They Don’t Shield Their Child From Pain
- They Don’t Feel Responsible For Their Child’s Emotions
- They Don’t Prevent Their Child From Making Mistakes
- They Don’t Confuse Discipline With Punishment
- They Don’t Take Shortcuts To Avoid Discomfort
- They Don’t Lose Sight Of Their Values
- Why Amy decided to write a list of what mentally strong parents don’t do instead of what they do
- What is a ‘calm down kit’ and how to create one
- How getting kids involved in making the world a better place helps get them out of the victim mentality
- What not to do when your kid says ‘I hate you!’
- Why you must allow your kids to feel their emotions
- How to give your kids firsthand practice on managing their feelings
- How a child’s anxiety is reduced when the parent is a solid leader
- How to empower kids without giving them too much power
- How kids learn when they watch how parents deal with their own uncomfortable feelings
- Amy’s parting wisdom on how to be a better parent
[bctt tweet=”‘Ask yourself what life lessons do I want my kids to learn, and do my priorities reflect my values?’ @AmyMorinLCSW #parenting #values #raisingchildren ” username=”gooddadprojct”]
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[bctt tweet=”‘You want kids to arrive at their own conclusions rather than us always telling them ‘no don’t think that way.” – @AmyMorinLCSW #parenting #parentingtips #dads #moms” username=”gooddadprojct”]
Amy Morin’s Links
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- Amazon Bestselling Book: The Dad’s Edge – 9 Simple Ways to Have: Unlimited Patience, Improved Relationships, and Positive Lasting Memories
- Larry’s New Course: The Dad’s Edge – 6 Strategies to Achieve: Unlimited Patience, Improved Relationships, and Positive Lasting Memories
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