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Modern Rites of Passage for Today’s Boys

What is a rite of passage? What purpose did it serve in a boy’s life? How can we create modern rites of passage for today’s boys?

In this Thursday Throwdown, we are excited to have Tim Wright. He is a pastor, author, podcaster, and co-leader of The Helping Boys Thrive Summit with Michael Gurian. Today he talks about the history of the rite of passage and what significance it had in different cultures. He also tells us how we can create rites of passage or manhood ceremonies for our sons in every stage of life.

“If we don’t harness the energy of boys, they’ll either become passive or destructive.”—Tim Wright

Tim Wright

Tim Wright has been a pastor in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America since 1984. In 2005, he started Community of Grace in Peoria, Arizona. He’s authored five books and has trained pastors and church leaders throughout the US and around the world. Along with Michael Gurian, he co-created the rite of passage program: Following Jesus: A Heroic Quest for Boys. He and his wife, Jan, raised a daughter and a son. They are now happily investing their lives in their three grandchildren.

What You’ll Learn

  • Why we should mark milestone events for boys (and girls)
  • Different stages in life to honor with ceremony: turning 16, turning 21, marriage, first child.
  • There are many men in boys’ bodies because they never made the transition into manhood.
  • The structure of the rite of passage process
  • How boys who don’t have rites of passage will create their own negative rituals, like college hazings.
  • Boys used to work alongside their fathers and grandfathers on the farm. Modern boys are raised by women and dads have outsourced their parenting to schools and coaches.
  • Boys are now behind in school and in the job market.
  • The ideal age to initiate a rite of passage.
  • Forming modern rites of passage around challenges your son will face like money, sex, and alcohol.
  • Instilling HEROIC values:
    • Honorable
    • Enterprising
    • Responsible
    • Original
    • Intimate
    • Creative
  • How to know when to help your son and when to let him help himself.


The Transition from Boy to Man

Creating a Rite of Passage Experience for Your Son

Modern Manhood: What it Means to Be a Good Man Today with Cleo Stiller

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Tim Wright



The Wonder of Parenting Podcast




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