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The Life-Changing Experiences of Rites of Passages with Steven Arms

In years past, many cultures have had rites of passages for young boys transitioning into manhood. Over recent decades, these rites of passages for boys have since vanished. However, a rite of passage is a powerful transitional experience for a young man that can be an empowering experience that can change his life in such a profound manner. In this episode we talk about the benefits of a rite of passage, the life changing experiences and the lessons that serve a man for a lifetime.

Steven Arms lives in Portland, Oregon with his wife and is the proud father of two young children. He is an author, speaker, thought leader, and innovator.

He’s also the best selling author of Milestone to Manhood, a Christian right of passage to help your 13 year old son make the leap from boyhood to manhood. He’s got a passion for teaching others. He writes in a way to record the best practices of various aspects of life. His writing reflects his personal interests, which include faith, family, athletics, and engineering.

His book, Milestone to Manhood is about a once in a lifetime weekend that a father or a grandfather can take and organize his son on his 13th birthday. The weekend is designed to mark your son’s entrance into manhood in a meaningful way, in addition to bestowing the title of Man onto your son. The purpose of the weekend is also to share advice and wisdom with him.

What You’ll Learn

19:04 What it means to be a man

Steve Arms talks about the rite of passage he does with his family, one goal they have is for the boy to know what it means to be a man through integrity, honesty, seeing what kind of friends he chooses, how to treat women, the relationship with money, etc.

They also share stories of other generations and what it meant to them growing up or being a man in their time, it’s like passing on wisdom.

For Steve Arms, the rite of passage is to set the bar on manhood instead of having the culture do it for you.

26:21 Letters Gifting

In the rite of passage, letters from all the family members are given, after that something of sentimental value not necessarily monetary is given to the boy and for Steve Arms and his family it is a way of telling the boy that he is becoming a man and they entrust him with this family heirloom with great sentimental value. It’s more about trust.

32:20 Ribbon Ceremony

Steve Arms talks about the ribbon ceremony performed at the rite of passage. Each of the men in the family has 6 ribbons on a wooden stick, 3 ribbons are of virtues and 3 of flaws. The boy has to choose the qualities he wants to keep from each one.

At the end of this ceremony the men burn the defects in the fire that symbolically represent that they want to get rid of this but they can only do it through God, not alone.

Steven Arms’ Links


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