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Star Wars and Being a Good Dad

Whether you are a big Star Wars fan or you simply know the basics, I have no doubt you know the story.

In a nutshell, the whole story is about Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader.  Moreover, Star Wars illustrates the sacred relationship between Father and Son.

One of the most shocking moments in movie history is when Darth Vader reveals to Luke Skywalker that he is Luke’s father.  It was a movie moment that we will never forget.

If you watch “Empire Strikes Back” and “Return of the Jedi,”  you really see it is more of an internal battle within Luke Skywalker to NOT become like his father.  Luke has many tendencies that are similar to Vader/Anakin.

He is impatient, he loses his temper, and….he is desperately trying to avoid the same mistakes that his father made.

How does this relate to us as Fathers?

Perhaps your childhood was challenging?  Maybe your father had a temper?  An addiction?  Perhaps he was not present for your childhood at all?   Overall, your Father had a “Dark Side.”

All of these challenges have become a part of your own “blueprint” as a father.  We learn a great deal from our own upbringing and our childhood examples.  We learn what to do or what not to do from our own parents.

One of the most popular quotes from Yoda:  “You must unlearn what you have learned.”

This can be one of the most difficult things to do.

Contrary to popular belief, being a Good Dad is not necessarily something that comes naturally.  In fact, if you come from a challenging childhood, it can be extremely difficult to break the cycle.

If you think back to Empire, Luke had so many internal struggles.  In Jedi, he still had internal struggles.  However, one thing was very clear…

He made a purposeful decision to break the pattern.

If you are here and reading this, that is exactly what you are doing.  You are searching for ways to make your journey as a Dad more enjoyable.

As a community of Dads (and Moms), we become stronger as parents when we hear the suggestions from others in our community.

What has helped you become a better parent regardless of your upbringing?  How have you been able to “unlearn what you have learned?”

Please leave a comment below.

Thanks again for being a part of our community.


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  1. My father was taken away from us when I was a young boy. I recall those times when my father would come home after working the 2nd shift at the factory. I would instantly wake up when I heard the key inserted into the front door around midnight. Careful not to wake my brother, who shared a sofa bed with me, I raised my head and look his way. He would see me and give me a nod as he tip toed his way to my side of the couch. He would give me his famous big smile and gently touch my face. He would look into my eyes long enough for me to know he loved me. That was all I needed. I felt like the luckiest kid in the world. Touching is so important.

    Our culture places strict limitations on touching behavior. Our social consciousness limits our touch to socially acceptable and symbolic occasions. Yet, we need touch, and unless we’ve been seriously deprived, we enjoy touching and being touched. We trust this channel of communication. Thus, we find ourselves hooked on the horns of a social dilemma which severely limits our touching behavior.

    Affectionate touching plays an important role in communicating with your child. I think of my father often all those years ago each time I look at my son, caress his face and pull the blanket closer to his face…I’d like to think that he’ll have a peaceful nights sleep….like the one’s I had all those years ago.

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