Finding Your Identity Through Defining Moments with Ilan Muallem

What You’ll Learn: 

Ilan’s Relationship with His Father

[13:45]

Throughout his younger years, Ilan’s father supported him through difficult times. Ilan recalls being a very difficult child and the patience his father used when dealing with him.

Support Through Ilan’s Youth

[20:31]

There was tension in Ilan’s home among him and his brother. Although Ilan’s father wasn’t perfect, he was always there for him. 

Support Through Teenage Years

[26:31]

Ilan recalls testing the boundaries of what he could get away with as a teenager. He used drugs and fights as an outlet for his built-up energy. No matter how horrible he was to his father, he could always go to his father to talk to him.

Right of passage

[29:28]

There comes a point in your life when the consequences escalate and you have to be held accountable for your actions. The right of passage leads a boy to manhood.

[33:29]

Boys need a right of passage in which they are put in a situation where they are held accountable for their actions. Being a man when Ilan was younger meant being rough and doing drugs because there was no system in place to teach him or empower him

[42:09]

Success means being consistent. Encouragement is the most important virtue for a young man. There are many identifying moments in your life that will lead to your true identity.

[44:52]

Ilan taking care of his father was a defining moment in life and made him feel empowered. He became a more empathic person.

Health scare

[45:36]

Everything is fleeting and temporary. Every moment is a choice. Every person has a breaking point when the pain is continuous. No matter how bad things are today, doesn’t mean they’re going to be that bad tomorrow.

Worry Is Like a Down-Payment

[51:57]

Don’t get caught up in expectations

[53:10]

The people who are most empowered are people who can interface with reality the clearest. Their internal reality and actual reality itself are in line with each other.

[55:22]

When you worry about something, you pay for it twice. Worry is a down-payment on things that haven’t happened yet.

Current Relationships

[59:55]

Ilan always wanted to be around people and influence them. Young men need someone they can confide in and trust. 

What comes next?

[1:07:00]

Ilan tells us he’s excited about building his voice and putting out valuable content into the world. Our society needs to start humanizing masculinity and lift each other up, instead of tearing men down.

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