Self-Compassion Instead of Self-Sacrifice
At the Dad Edge Alliance, we’re disrupting the default settings of fatherhood so that we can go from living ordinary to extraordinary lives. One of the reasons we men become frustrated and burned out is because we feel it’s our job to shoulder the load for everyone. But if we practice self-compassion instead of self-sacrifice, not only will we feel happier, but we’ll also find we have more to give to everyone in our lives.
Today we interview another dad in the trenches. John Culford is a recent Dad Edge Alliance member who’s been married for fourteen years and is the father of two sons, aged twelve and thirteen.
John shares his challenges with communication, understanding, and connection with his wife and kids. He reveals what strategies he’s implementing to make his family grow closer during quarantine and beyond. He also tells us how getting into the habit of being kind to himself, claiming space, and opening up about his struggles with his family his secret to staying grounded and moving forward.
You don’t necessarily have to sacrifice yourself for the benefit of others.—John Culford, DEA member
What You’ll Learn
- John’s experience with a pre-marriage bootcamp
- We he’s learned that no conflict is really resolved
- How to listen effectively during disagreements so that your spouse knows she’s being heard
- Why Joh is setting aside 1 hour a week with his wife to talk about things they don’t know about each other.
- Strip down to the facts of a challenging problem or source of stress. We often don’t know why we’re really bothered by something.
- Detach from feelings when thinking of solutions to a problem. Emotion creates noise that distracts us from the best path forward.
- How to parent a child with anxiety
- How to be there for your kids when they’ve matured and don’t open up to you any more
- How to intentionally make time for important discussions so it’s best for everyone
- Why you must remove “buts” from your responses
- How to show your kids to turn challenging situations like coronavirus into a positive experience they look back and remember in a positive light.
- How to explain to your family when you need time alone.
Be kind to yourself. You’re going to fail. As put together as you think you are it’s okay to make mistakes. Let your family become part of that story.—John Culford, DEA member
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IT’S TIME TO REINVENT HOW WE SHOW UP FOR OUR FAMILIES
Coronavirus is forcing our evolution as fathers. We are all going to build a whole new set of superpowers. And these superpowers are needed right now. For many of us, we are multiplying our future ability to serve, exponentially.
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Guest Speakers
Bestselling author of “Design Your Future.”
