Love Languages and Other Marriage Tips for the Pandemic with Gary Chapman

Gary Chapman is the author of one of the most popular books on marriage in the world, The 5 Love Languages. Today he talks about his new book, 5 Simple Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage: …When You’re Stuck at Home Together.

Whether it has been challenging or delightful for you to be spending more time with your spouse during COVID-19, it’s the perfect time to troubleshoot and renew your love. If you have a good marriage, this will make it better. If you have a troubled marriage, this will tear down the walls and help you start rebuilding.

Get on the fast track to a loving, harmonious marriage with these 5 simple tips!

“Love is a choice you make every day.” – Dr. Gary Chapman

 

Gary Chapman

Gary Chapman, PhD, is the author of the bestselling The 5 Love Languages® series, which has sold more than 12 million worldwide and has been translated into 50 languages. Dr. Chapman travels the world presenting seminars on marriage, family, and relationships, and his radio programs air on more than 400 stations. He lives in North Carolina with his wife, Karolyn.

5 Simple Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage …When You’re Stuck at Home Together

Let Sheltering in Place Together be an Opportunity to Renew Your Relationship
The COVID-19 pandemic has affected all facets of life. The health crisis has overwhelmed medical workers, business closings have exacerbated financial stress, and—perhaps most unexpectedly—sheltering in place has placed married couples in endless, unprecedented proximity.

Whether this has been challenging or delightful for you and your spouse, let this time be an opportunity to renew your love. Learn how to do so in 5 Simple Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage… When You’re Stuck at Home Together by Dr. Gary Chapman, author of The New York Times bestseller The 5 Love Languages®. This guide will help enrich your time stuck together by teaching you and your spouse how to:

• Call a truce on throwing word bombs
• Tear down emotional walls
• Discover and speak each other’s love language
• Learn the value of teamwork
• Have a daily “sit down and listen” time

What You’ll Learn

• Practice your spouse’s love language, not yours.
• The biggest challenge is when your spouse’s love language is something you haven’t received as a child. But you can learn to speak them even if you didn’t receive them.
• How to get back to loving each other intentionally
• When we’re under stress, we throw verbal bombs at each other.
• Verbal bombs burst inside the hearts of our spouses.
• Call a truce, and vow not say anything negative for a week.
• Replace negative comments with compliments.
• Even if your spouse doesn’t agree to refrain from negative comments, call the truce on your side. It will automatically help.
• Daily Sit Down and Listen Time (not Talk Time)—Ask your spouse to share 3 things that happened today and how they felt about them.
• Even if you live together, you don’t know the person’s thoughts and how they feel about what’s going on.
• Listening says, “I care about you.”
• Listen long enough so you can honestly say that you understand. You do not have to agree.
• Don’t criticize the way your partner feels.
• Your spouse will be more likely to affirm you if you’ve taken the first step.
• Use your energy to solve the problem instead of winning the argument.
• How to be accommodating without becoming a doormat
• If you win an argument with your spouse, you’ve created a loser. It’s no fun to live with a loser.
• You’re a team. Each player on the team does something different. Use an attitude of service and play your strengths.
• Love stimulates love.
• There are no perfect husbands. When we fail in word or deed, we need to apologize to our spouses.
• When we apologize and seek to speak her love language, it starts a process.
• Don’t sit around waiting for a person to change. We as men, should make the decision to lead.
• We can influence our spouse in a positive way using their love language.
• Make a 6-month commitment to using these 5 tips.
• When you start moving in a positive direction as a couple, you are likely to continue moving forward.

RELATED EPISODES:

Strong Fathers, Strong Kids with Meg Meeker

How to Argue and Other Marriage Tips with Zach Brittle

The 5 Love Languages and How They Made My Marriage Thrive

 

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